If we were keeping score, here is what it would be:
Month of April = 3,472,803
Family of nonsoccermom/Modernish Father = 0

Reasons why I hate April and wish it was May, already (in list form, because that seems to be the only way I can write a post these days):

1. Daycare payment literally as large as my mortgage due to ridiculous “supply fees” on top of regular tuition costs for two children.

2. First full month without any side income (N used to do the website for a Texas-based theater chain. Until last month when they dropped him with no warning). This is fabulous timing (see reason #1).

3. I have nothing to do at work, which makes me feel like I am wasting precious time with my baby by sitting here doing NOTHING all day long. (Unless you are my boss. Then I am very, very busy! Too busy for words!)

4. I still have no sick time or vacation to speak of, since I wiped it all out during maternity leave. So I have no choice but to sit at my desk. (Working very hard!!)

5. Ear infection in older child, resulting in $80 of doctor co-pays and various medicines. And of course a sick child, which always sucks.

6. I have pinkeye. In both eyes. HATE. I also seem to be very…sinusey or something.

7. Prescription pinkeye medicine costs $30. I had no choice but to fill it since my eye was practically swollen shut by the time I got the prescription (from my kids’ pediatrician, THANK GOD he felt bad for me).

8. Idiot dog whacks tip of crazily wagging tail against door jamb, consequently busting it open and spraying every surface in my living room and kitchen with blood. This results in something similar to a crime scene which took over half an hour to clean up. It even got on AE. I really, really wish I was joking.

9. Idiot cat annoys me (meow. meow! MEOW. MEOW! MEOW!) to the point of breakdown, causing me to knock her off the bathroom counter into the tub. She takes a candle holder and soap dish with her which both predictably shatter into zillions of pieces.

10. Five (5) vaccine shots in my poor infant’s chubby little thighs. Five!! Plus an oral vaccination which obviously tasted quite offensive.

11. The fallout from said shots, resulting in crappy sleep for all involved. Especially my husband, who had to sleep on the couch with her all Tuesday night, since the matted-shut goopy eyes rendered me useless.

12. Previously mentioned infant now being sick with a bad cold on top of shot fallout, requiring her father to stay home with her today, and probably me to stay home with her tomorrow. I don’t have enough sick leave for this. Not to mention that a sick baby is very sad.

13. If said infant is actually still sick enough for me to stay home with her tomorrow, I will of course take her to the doctor. That brings us to a total of three (3) visits to the pediatrician since last Friday. At $20 each.

14. For those of you keeping track, this will bring April’s medical costs to $150. See item #2.

Whee! Still two weeks of April to go!!!

However, all that being said: it really isn’t that bad and could definitely be worse – my friend’s brand-new little guy just got diagnosed with colic, for instance. And that truly sucks both for him and for his parents. My little Miss T is still doing her best to be happy, bless her heart – she will grace you with her adorable grin in the next breath after a coughing fit. She just amazes me.

I also know that I am beyond lucky that N is as involved in the kids’ care as he is. A lot of dads aren’t, and he is just a tremendous help and never (well, rarely) complains about it. Not to mention that my eyes are much better today (I opened them this morning without assistance in the form of a wet washcloth, yay!), the dog blood came off the flat wall paint remarkably well (who knew? I thought we would be looking at a new conversation starter), and the cat seems to have (temporarily) learned her lesson and left me alone in the bathroom this morning.

So it really isn’t all that bad. It could definitely be lots, lots worse. My heart just aches for this poor family. I just cannot even imagine the pain they must be going through. My children are (generally speaking) very healthy and happy and for that I am thankful every single day.

Edited to add: Does my site look really, really jacked up to anyone else? The fonts are all wacky, the links are waaaaaaaaaay down at the bottom of the page, and the columns are…not right. Is it just me? Score one more for April, I guess.