If I were giving out awards, the categories and winners would go something like this:

Best Timing of Illness for Maximum Weekend Ruinage goes to none other than little Miss T.  She managed to impressively hail the arrival of a 24-hour stomach bug within an hour of getting to The Swamp on Saturday.  Sometime during our trip home yesterday she made a full recovery.

Best New Catchphrase goes to my sister Sher, for coining the term “hurgly-gurgly”.  As in, Maybe I caught that bug from Miss T.  My stomach feels somewhat hurgly-gurgly. 

Best Effort at Procrastination and Overall Life Change Denial goes to my parents, who are supposed to be out of their house at 8 p.m. on June 27th and have yet to pack a single box.  Oh, there are boxes and bins in the living room, but they are all sitting empty, apparently just waiting for items to jump in and pack themselves.  Sixteen years my parents have lived in that house and now they have less than 16 days to pack it all up.  Good luck with that, folks.

Best Redundant Sentence has to go to me, I’m afraid.  Good thing I proof my work-related e-mails before sending them, because I discovered this gem earlier today:  Originally he had indicated that it was not necessary to do so, but since usually we do so, I wanted to confirm before I did so.  DEAR GOD.  Someone get me a thesaurus, stat.

Best Failed Attempt at Following Instructions goes to AE.  Poor kid.  He tries, but sometimes he just gets half the point.  I told him last night that if he was going to wear socks to bed that he would need to take them off in the morning and put them in his Mickey Mouse backpack when he got dressed for swimming.  That way he would have socks for the rest of day camp.  He listened carefully and then slipped out of the room while I was talking to his dad.  He reappeared a few moments later and announced I put my socks in my Finding Nemo backpack!  Now what do I do?

Best Handler of Challenging Mate goes to my husband, of course.  Having been married for eight years (today!) I think it is safe to say that my husband is worth keeping.  He knows how to make me laugh, how to make me feel safe, and how to sum up important world events in a way that doesn’t bore me.   He can stay.  For now.  🙂