As I was in the breakroom, getting a cup of coffee.

Coworker 1: So I hear you just got back from visiting the kids and that new grandbaby!

Coworker 2: Yes, I did!  I’ve been trying not to gush too much unless people ask…I’m sure it’s annoying.

Coworker 1: How was the trip?  I’m sure you had a wonderful time!

Coworker 2: Oh it was fantastic.  And it looks like they’ll be coming here for Christmas this year, which will be really good because my mother-in-law hasn’t seen them in a really long time.  She didn’t even make it to the wedding, she’s just too old.

Coworker 1: So did you ever put her down?

Coworker 2: [horrified pause]  Put…who…down?

Coworker 1: Your granddaughter!  I would have held her all the time and never wanted to put her down!!

Coworker 2: [immensely relieved]  Oh!  The baby!  Right.

*****

As I was sitting in my cubicle, this took place a few cubes away.

Very young, incredibly softspoken male coworker: [unintelligible]  Mmmmfmssmefffmrrffrrmmp.

Female coworker: Well I don’t think that’s right.  Are you sure?

VYISMC: Mmm! Mmfshrrrpmmmmffff.

Female coworker: That just really doesn’t seem right to me.  Let me check.

VYISMC: [waiting patiently]

Female coworker: Huh, what do you know.  You’re right!

VYISMC: Trmmooo!  Mmmfrrmmfssssshhhp!

Female coworker: Boy, I’m old enough to be your mama.  You should know better than to talk to me that way!

VYISMC: !!!

Female coworker: [laughing hysterically]