Less than three weeks, guys. Like 19 days or something at this point. We can do this. We can survive this election.

Honestly, I’ve always been sort of a lazy voter. I’ve rarely bothered with local elections at all, because I don’t usually keep up with the issues and don’t want to vote if I’m uninformed. I did vote in the 2000 presidential election, the first one I was old enough for, but then I skipped 2004 because I was largely indifferent (look, I had a toddler and a new job and I was a little busy). I voted for Obama in 2008 and 2012 and, well, here we are.

All that to say: I have paid more attention to this election campaign than I have to all the others in my life combined.  It is crazy and horrifying and yet I can’t seem to look away. Anyone who follows me on twitter has been inundated with my opinion for months now. I’ve been blasting out my frustration in 140-character snippets but that isn’t enough. I just have far too much to say, and even though I never write here anymore (seriously, it’s been almost two years…oops) I had to say my piece…or at least part of it. My husband, as usual, wrote something far more eloquent and fact-filled than I could ever hope to, and I strongly recommend that you head on over to his blog to check that out.

At any rate, here are my thoughts on one aspect of this circus sideshow:

Trump isn’t just an asshole. I mean, he IS an asshole, but he’s a lot of other things too. And none of them are good. I truly believe with every fiber of my being that there is not one good bone in that man’s body. He’s awful. Truly, truly just an awful person. My problems with this man are myriad (he’s infantile and a liar and a bigot to start) and I could probably write a thousand-page novel on the subject, but I don’t have time to write that, you don’t have time to read it and so for now there’s just one thing about Trump and his joke of a campaign that I really want to focus on.

He is completely, utterly disrespectful of women. You don’t even have to believe that he assaulted all the women who’ve accused him (though I do). All you need to do is look at the video evidence. He’s been caught on tape innumerable times talking inappropriately about Ivanka (ew) and rating women’s looks…not to mention the Billy Bush debacle. (Quick aside for a gentle reminder: Forcing yourself on an unwilling person is sexual assault. It doesn’t matter who you are or what your position is, if you grab another human by the privates against their will, you are assaulting them. It’s that simple.) I mean, come on, he’s using a woman’s looks in defending himself against the allegations by saying things like “Have you seen her? I don’t think so.” Who says that? Certainly not anyone who views women as equal human beings, but instead someone who views them merely as items to be desired – or not, dependent entirely on their looks. It’s very clear that he can only view women in light of their attractiveness. If you haven’t seen the Hillary Clinton ad that is simply just a compilation of his words, you need to watch it. Here. I’ll wait.

Now. Think about your daughters. Your granddaughters. If you are a woman, think about yourself. How would it make you feel if those demeaning words were directed at you? Would you be okay with it if a man called you a fat ugly pig? If he said that to your daughter? Would you be willing to just write those words off? I doubt that very much. And even if you were able to just let it go, you would probably never look at that man in the same way ever again. Here we have a man willing to say such things to women publicly, on live TV and in recorded interviews, and we’re expected to elect him into and then give him the respect due of the highest office in the country? I don’t think so. Not a chance.

Think about your sons and grandsons, and imagine them saying any of those things to a female classmate. Or a female coworker. Or a family member. If I caught my son saying ANY of the phrases in that very short video, I would subject him to a lecture on respect the likes of which he would never forget. If my husband ever said anything like that to me our marriage would be over. Full stop. There’s absolutely no excuse. None.

To me, just the fact that Trump’s knee-jerk response is always “NO ONE IS MORE RESPECTFUL OF WOMEN THAN ME” is very telling. Last night’s debate audience laughed out loud, it was such a preposterous statement. We all have seen him – numerous times – making disrespectful statements about women on live TV, so just by making such a grand statement in direct contradiction to previous behavior he’s insulting everyone’s intelligence. We see you, Donald Trump, and we’re calling you on your bullshit.  

We won’t even talk about his “nasty woman” comment last night, and the fact that he stalked Hillary onstage like a predator during the second debate.

It’s not just words. It’s never just words. It’s not locker room talk, and it is not normal or acceptable. If you’re voting for Trump because he “tells it like it is” then you need to think about what exactly he’s telling us with these hurtful, demeaning words. Don’t tell me that Hillary is just as bad, or that Trump is just blowing hot air and the words don’t mean anything. Casting a vote for Donald Trump excuses his behavior. Whether you can admit it to yourself or not, it does.

Voting for Trump normalizes devaluation and disrespect of women.

It endorses rape culture.

It does nothing to promote women’s rights and equality in our society, and in fact is a vote against them.

It certainly is not going to make this country a better, safer place for our daughters.

It sends a message to our sons that treating women like second-class citizens is okay.

And casting a vote for Donald Trump may very well may be hurting someone you love.