A transcript of an e-mail conversation between my sister and myself this morning:

Sher: So I have already had food drama this morning.*  A vendor brought us donuts yesterday and there were leftovers.  I was very much looking forward to eating the leftovers this morning as I always do.  I get in the kitchen and they aren’t there.  I checked the trash and someone had thrown away the whole box.  Yes there were only 4 donuts left in it, but WTF?  Who throws shit away that has only been there one day and WITHOUT asking if anyone wants them first?  So I pulled the donuts OUT of the trash (there was nothing else in there and they were still securely in the box uncontaminated).  I ate 2 and left them there in case I wanted more.  I guess at that point I should have sent an email to let people know I pulled them out of the trash so eat at your own risk, but I am usually the only one that touches day old donuts so I didn’t bother.  WELL then Kim sends a nasty email about how someone pulled the donuts out of the trash and DO NOT EAT because they weren’t refrigerated and were thrown away.  I realize it is mildly gross to pull things out of the trash and I should have sent an email, but I sent her an email back saying she shouldn’t be so wasteful and should ask people before she starts throwing shit away.**  I hate this place sometimes.

Me: OOOOOOOOOMG.  WHAT THE HELL is WRONG with the people at your office?!***  Since when do donuts need to be refrigerated, first of all, and why would she go out of her way to send an e-mail about the “contaminated” donuts?   THAT IS REALLY FREAKING WEIRD.  Did she respond to your e-mail?  Oh, and by the way, I probably would have pulled them out of the trash too, assuming that it was otherwise empty and the box integrity had not been compromised.  So you are not alone in being a dirty, dirty girl.

Sher: I know right?  Now someone else pulled the kolaches out of the trash and I guess that was what she was most worried about because they had been sitting out and had cheese in them.  But donuts???  Why would you throw the donuts away???  She is such a control freak.  I am so sick of all the CONTROL freaks here.  Gah!!!!  Glad to hear I am not the only one that would pull uncontaminated donuts out of the trash- (and Joyce ate one too!)  Because seriously her email made it sound like I was some kind of sick freak.****

*  Her office seems to have an inordinate amount of bizarre food-related situations.

**  I am willing to bet that Sher worded it exactly like that.

***  Why are there even leftovers at all?

****  Not just because of that, anyway. 🙂